Not only am I falling in love with this baby, but each day I fall more and more in love with Scott. Having a baby is bringing out a whole new side to him and I'm thrilled about this new dimension to his personality. He loves this kid (but still reassures me that he has no interest in other people's kids!) and is super protective of it. He rubs my belly, listens to see if he can hear the baby move, and talks to the baby. So sweet!
Scott went away this weekend. In and of itself, this isn't abnormal. He has gone away for long periods (weeks or months) on numerous occasions during our 13 year relationship. However, he hadn't gone away since I found out that I was pregnant and I felt quite alone and vulnerable while he was gone. It was weird to not have him around to feel the baby move. It was strange to not give him updates on how my day went. It was scary to think that something might happen to him while he's away. I feel a new sense of worry about having something happen to him. I've always been pretty independent but the idea of raising a child on my own totally terrifies me. I need him in my life more than ever and I know that this baby needs him around to be a father. I think that Scott also senses this new level of responsibility. Amongst other things, he is a more cautious skier and speaks often of his protective thoughts regarding our unborn baby. In a previous post, I had made note of my thankfulness for having nine months to adjust to the idea of having a baby. It seems that this nine months of adjusting is just as important for fathers and allows for a strong level of bonding between the parents and the baby. Such an amazing thing to witness!
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